World Cup Finals: Whores vs. Allah

Muslim Riots at German Bordello

from Sploid

All of Germany is busy getting ready to host soccer's World Cup, even the hookers and pimps. But when Europe's largest whorehouse tried to make all the players feel welcome, their efforts incited yet another Muslim riot.

Pascha is a seven-storey bordello in downtown Cologne. It's home to over a 100 hookers and has its own restaurant, beauty center, boutique, laundromat, tanning salon and bistro. They even offer a money-back guarantee.

To make sure the soccer players knew where they could get their kicks, manager Armin Lobscheid had a billboard draped over one side of the building. The sign shows a lovely young woman pulling up her bra as she says "A Time to Make Girlfriends", a play on the World Cup's slogan "A Time to Make Friends."

Beneath the independent contractor's panties are the flags of the 32 countries competing in this year's tournament, including Muslim nations Saudi Arabia and Iran. On the opposite side of the building they erected the flags of the of the countries.

In no time Muslims came knocking, saying that the inclusion of Saudi Arabia and Iran in the campaign was an insult to Prophet Muhammad.

Lobscheid was unmoved, until the masked, knife-wielding mob showed up some hours later.

"On Friday evening we were threatened by 11 masked men who demand that we take down the Saudi Arabian flag," Lobscheid told the Kölner Express, a local newspaper.

So Lobscheid had both the Saudi Arabian and Iranian flags taken down, but the flags were still printed on the poster.

"On Saturday night there were 20 masked men armed with knives and sticks. They threatened to get violent and even bomb the place unless we black out the Iranian and Saudi Arabian flags on the poster as well," said Lobscheid.

The mob dispersed before cops could make any arrests.

"They didn't want these two flags to be associated with this go-go girl on the banner as it's a brothel and it offended their religious feelings," said a spokeswoman for the Cologne police.

Since then Lobscheid has had the flags on the poster blacked out, but is considering filing a complaint.

For reasons unknown, there have been no complaints about the presence of the Tunisian flag bearing the Muslim crescent.


Anonymous kelly g. said...

What, no Breakfast of Blasphemy thong?

April 25, 2006 1:44 PM  
Blogger lesralack said...

With all due respect, FUCK THE MUSLIMS.
Since when do they make the rules?

April 25, 2006 3:00 PM  
Blogger gnome said...

Hope fuck doesn't mean "bomb", my bloddthirsty friend... Fighting religion is one thing, being a bigot something else. Anyway.
Why fuck Muslims? I prefer fucking Christians and thee do live closer...

No hard feelings though, and I guess that te whole story is simply funny. A bit terryfying but funny nonetheless...

April 26, 2006 7:19 AM  

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