3.18.2006

'Your Lab Results Are In - You Might Want To Sit Down...
I Wish I Had Better News: Your Mormonism Tested Positive for Bullshit. I'm Very Sorry...'


'...You have the Absolute viral strain, which is, as you know, terminal. There are no known treatments and no cure. Absolute Bullshit is Absolute Bullshit, as they say. No, denial will only prolong the inevitable. Ooh, and look here: Those "seer stones" of yours? Just rocks. Silly little rocks. Oh, please, have a Kleenex. Now if you'll excuse me, I have other patients. Please pay the nurse on your way out. Cash only. *click* Mary? Please send in the Scientologist... *click* (God, I love this job!)'

Faith Under Fire: DNA Evidence Contradicts a Key Tenet of Mormonism, but Church Says It Doesn't Undermine Creed

from Los Angeles Times

From The scientific term is 'poppycock'the time he was a child in Peru, the Mormon Church instilled in Jose A. Loayza the conviction that he and millions of other Native Americans were descended from a lost tribe of Israel that reached the New World more than 2,000 years ago.

"We were taught all the blessings of that Hebrew lineage belonged to us and that we were special people," said Loayza, now a Salt Lake City attorney. "It not only made me feel special, but it gave me a sense of transcendental identity, an identity with God."

A few years ago, Loayza said, his faith was shaken and his identity stripped away by DNA evidence showing that the ancestors of American natives came from Asia, not the Middle East.

"I've gone through stages," he said. "Absolutely denial. Utter amazement and surprise. Anger and bitterness."

For Mormons, the lack of discernible Hebrew blood in Native Americans is no minor collision between faith and science. It burrows into the historical foundations of the Book of Mormon, a 175-year-old transcription that the church regards as literal and without error.

Critics want the church to admit its mistake and apologize to millions of Native Americans that it converted. Church leaders have shown no inclination to do so. Indeed, they have dismissed as heresy any suggestion that Native American genetics undermine the Mormon creed.

Yet at the same time, the church has subtly promoted a fresh interpretation of the Book of Mormon intended to reconcile the DNA findings with the scriptures. This analysis is radically at odds with long-standing Mormon teachings.

Some longtime observers say they believe that, ultimately, the vast majority of Mormons will disregard the genetic research as an unworthy distraction from their faith.

"This may look like the crushing blow to Mormonism from the outside," said Jan Shipps, a professor emeritus of religious studies at Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis who has studied the church for 40 years. "But religion ultimately does not rest on scientific evidence, but on mystical experiences. There are different ways of looking at truth."

According Never happened.to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, an angel named Moroni led Joseph Smith in 1827 to a divine set of golden plates buried in a hillside near his New York home. God provided the 22-year-old Smith with a pair of glasses and seer stones that allowed him to translate the "Reformed Egyptian" writings on the golden plates into the Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ.

Mormons believe these scriptures restored the church to God's original vision and left the rest of Christianity in a state of apostasy.

The book's narrative focuses on a tribe of Jews who sailed from Jerusalem to the New World in 600 B.C. and split into two main warring factions.

The God-fearing Nephites were "pure" (the word was officially changed from "white" in 1981) and "delightsome." The idol-worshiping Lamanites received the "curse of blackness," turning their skin dark.

According to the Book of Mormon, by 385 A.D. the dark-skinned Lamanites had wiped out other Hebrews. The Mormon church called the victors "the principal ancestors of the American Indians." If the Lamanites returned to the church, their skin could once again become white.

Over the years, church prophets - believed by Mormons to receive revelations from God - and missionaries have used the supposed ancestral link between the ancient Hebrews and Native Americans and later Polynesians as a prime conversion tool in Central and South America and the South Pacific. "As I look into your faces, I think of Father Lehi (patriarch of the Lamanites), whose sons and daughters you are," Gordon B. Hinckley, the church's president, said in 1997 during a Mormon conference in Lima, Peru. "I think he must be shedding tears today, tears of love and gratitude.... This is but the beginning of the work in Peru."

In recent years, Mormonism has flourished in those regions, which now have nearly 4 million members - about a third of Mormon membership worldwide, according to church figures.

Critics Jesus and Felipe argue over who has to take the Jeep out for tacosof the Book of Mormon have long cited anachronisms in its narrative to argue that it is not the work of God. For instance, the Mormon scriptures contain references to a seven-day week, domesticated horses, cows and sheep, silk, chariots, and steel.

None had been introduced in the Americas at the time of Christ.

In the 1990s, DNA studies gave Mormon detractors further ammunition. The problem is that Mormon leaders cannot acknowledge any factual errors in the Book of Mormon because the prophet Joseph Smith proclaimed it the "most correct of any book on Earth," Southerton said in an interview.

"They can't admit that it's not historical," Southerton said. "They would feel that there would be a loss of members and loss in confidence in Joseph Smith as a prophet."

Officially, the Mormon Church says that nothing in the Mormon scriptures is incompatible with DNA evidence and that the genetic studies are being twisted to attack the church.



'Lalalalalalaeyecanthearyoooouuuuulalalala...'

4 Comments:

Blogger velid said...

They have an angel named Moroni. I think that just about sums it up.

March 20, 2006 12:09 PM  
Blogger Dr. W. Sumner Davis said...

Let us not forget that Joseph Smith misunderstood the word for "Tablets" , having recieved a D in Hebrew from seminary. These were supposedly Papyrus scrolls. The only testament sadder than this man making such claims is that even today, in the modern world where no child should starve and no one should die from war, people still flock to religions seeking some greater meaning. In a world like we COULD have, the one elemnet opressing so many billions is religion. never a good idea- and getting worse every day.

January 05, 2007 9:29 AM  
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December 13, 2009 10:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Somewhat great article. Mormon fails.

September 06, 2010 10:03 PM  

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