6.29.2006

How Many Lightbulbs Does It Take To Screw In a Muslim?

Just One, Praise Allah!

Lightbulb-ectomy

from Sploid

Most prisoners make a habit of sleeping on their backs. It's a matter of personal safety, who knows what will end up inside you. One man in Pakistan recently learned that lesson the hard. Luckily, doctors were able to remove the lightbulb from his ass without breaking it.

"Thanks Allah, now I feel comfort. Today, I had my breakfast. I was just drinking water, nothing else," said Fateh Mohammad.

Instead of thanking Allah, maybe Mohammad should be asking him who put the lightbulb up his ass.

"I don't know who did this to me. Police or other prisoners," the 40-year-old man claims.

Mohammad is doing time for making moonshine in violation of Muslim law. He says he was a surprised as anybody when he learned what was wrong.

"When I woke up I felt a pain in my lower abdomen, but later in hospital, they told me this," Mohammad said.

"We had to take it out intact," said Dr. Farrukh Aftab at Nishtar Hospital. "Had it been broken inside, it would be a very very complicated situation."

Despite Mohammad's pleas of ignorance, doctors are having a hard time believing his claim that somebody drugged him and screwed in the lightbulb.

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